We all know about resolutions, but they usually focus on the bad things that we need to change. Why not, this year, decide to focus on good resolutions that bring good feelings and improvements
People often have markers in their lives, times when they decide to make a real effort to do something positive for themselves and to change something unwanted about themselves.Things like stopping smoking, getting fitter, losing weight often feature as important. A key factor may be a wedding, a birthday, getting divorced. The event triggers a real decision to commit to a course of action that will bring about a change for the better.
Why not though, instead of 'doing without' which resolutions are often about, decide instead to 'add in'. So that instead of giving up different things that we know are bad for us or are doing us harm, why not commit to a schedule of positive lovely treats. These treats will result in a good feeling of pleasure and satisfaction that will often negate the need for bad or harmful things in our life. None of these things need to cost much money, but can really be savoured and enjoyed.
Some of my thoughts are things like :
- Clean freshly laundered sheets. When the sheets are changed really look forward to the thought of a good nights sleep in a fresh smelling bed. Maybe add a drop or two of lavender to the final rinse cycle.
- Good quality chocolate. Rather than buy several cheaper bars, buy one bar of good high end chocolate, maybe even organic, and settle down to enjoy every mouthful, really savouring the taste so that it is a proper chocolate experience.
- Buy flowers, but put them in an unexpected place, like the bathroom, so that taking a shower or getting ready in the morning is done in a more pleasant environment.
- Rather than rush from job to job at home, take time to organise things so that you can enjoy what you have done. So, for example, after working in the garden sit in it and enjoy a drink, or after tidying the lounge relax in it and enjoy reading a book or a newspaper.
- Catch up with friends. Make time to meet for a coffee or lunch and enjoy each others company. Share your stories, exchange advice. It is important to maintain contact with friends. They are a valuable part of our support network.
- Sit when eating, especially when eating the meals that are usually rushed, like breakfast or lunch. It is good to give time to having a quiet break, even for a few minutes. It can make all the difference to the quality of the rest of the day ahead.
- Visit an art gallery or a museum on a free afternoon.
- Look at an old photograph album. Enjoy getting nostalgic about people and events.
- Play music in the car, and sing along.
- Book a massage
- Girls, have a pamper session at home with friends
- Guys, have a card night or watch the match with friends
- Open the good bottle of wine for yourself, rather than the cheap one that someone brought round and no one opened
- Smile at a stranger. You may well make their day.
These are just a few ideas that boost confidence and help us feel better about ourselves. By doing good things we often find that those negative behaviours and habits become less important, without us even trying.
This article was written by Susan Leigh, Counsellor and Hypnotherapist