Mental toughness is essential in business, but it my views of what mental toughness actually means has changed over time. I have long thought that it meant that nothing bothers you. I now realise as I have grown mentally tougher that actually that is not the case. To not be affected by anything would make you a very ruthless individual indeed and less than truly human. Control over what we project is vital, and to appear unphazed in a crisis is a good asset, but to not feel pain or anguish is neither viable nor desirable in the long run.
Mental toughness is in my experience more about recovery, determination and staying focused. In 2002 I was floored totally by a family crisis and took years to recover. Faced with a similar situation recently, all the old wounds were opened and I re-lived those dark times again, but this time I was back on my feet in a month. This time I was not only aware of where to go, who to see and what to do, I had clear objectives and contigencies. The pain was as intense as before and yet I was more able to recover from it.
No matter how tough we are, we can all be floored by a sucker punch, but the tough get back on their feet faster and fight back quicker. I have been much inspired by the examples of others, some well-known such as Nelson Mandela, and less famous people such as Elaine DeLack, who formulated the multiple-sclerosis drug Prokarin and has fought tirelessly to get it recognised by mainstream medicine against indifference. What unites them is their single-minded determination to see their belief prevail.
Having a teenage daughter is brilliant for keeping your feet on the ground. Just when I think I am a guru of self-control, she can have me in a rage in seconds! Mental toughness has meant not that I never get angry at her but that I don't get as angry for as long, determined and focused as I am to get this parenting thing right! Such is the nature of mental toughness, not a kind of emotional anaesthesia but rather "bouncebackability!"
